Cinderella is got to go !!!!

When I was just a little girl
My mama used to tuck me into bed
And she read me a story
It always was about a princess in distress
And how a guy would save her
And end with the glory

I lie in bed and think
About the person that
I wanted to be
Then one day I realized
The fairy tale life wasn't for me]

I don’t wanna be like Cinderella
Sitting in a dark old dusty cellar
Waiting for somebody to come and set me free
I don´t wanna be like Snow White waiting
For a handsome prince to come and save me
On a horse of white unless were riding side by side
Don´t wanna depend on no one else
I'd rather rescue myself !!!

Yeah.. i Dont wanna be like Cinderella... if i could i'd go and join army.. lol.. its looks so cool in tvand how people talk about army. I think its very difficult, but i rather be a soldier than a Cinderella ... cuz i better do my shit on my own, than waite for years for a handsome prince to come and save (do my shit for me). lol...
Yeah... Today we need some independence...

LMAO... hahahahahahaha... im laughin my ass !!!! IM CRAZY BITCH !! i dont even kno wat im sayin.. but even though i dont really want to be like Cinderella...

OKi dOKi !!!

HoLa bAck AMiGas AnD aMIgOs !!!.. How Ya doIN ?
Today is Friday. I like fridays...lloll.. cuz its the last day of skool. and then whole weekend of chillin and resting.. nice nice.. Any way.. im feelin good today. im in a good mood. I woke up and i felt like reaidn a lil..(thats something new, cuz i hate reading) but i need read 13 chapters for my english class, so i decided to read a lil.. Its good, cuz i like the book, its kinda intresting.. and the language its kool. like teenage langugae and its easy to understand/ thats KOOL !!.. So i read a lil, i aet some breakfast... its was yummi... i like it.. and then.. i talked to my mommy, that i wanna go shoppin, and she said, that we'll go 2morrow and buy some new clothes... lol..:) thats kool.,. today shes workin, so we cant go.. but i can waite till 2morrow. nice nice.. after that i started to clean my house, it wasnt fun at all, but now.. my house look nice.. and soo clean.. I diD GrEat JoB with my Bro anD lIl siS.. lol;). Kiss 4 THem;)
Oh.. Yesterday i talked ot my lovely sis, and oh my God... the stuff that she tole me,. about what she found out about her bf made me so Angry !!! FuCKin sOnoFtHebItch.. oh.. i swear. i'll kick his ass if this is true.. lol.. .. lol.. For now.. i hope everythiung will turn ok...... cuz she reallllly likes him.. .. dammmn. Any way.. now im going to my friend Amy, shes wating 4 me. idk wat we gonna do.. some chillin. lol.. thats all. i'll write later on some more.. bye amigos n amigas.. kiss 4 ya
BIG KISS AND HUg FOr MY LOvelY siS.. TakE cAre ANd doNt WOrRY, I HAve UR bAck !!! LovE u siSTA !!!!! sTElcZIk.. KISS YA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aHoLa !!!

HoLLa BaCk Ya AlL !!!.
o h i didnt write for a long ass time. lol.. lot of stuff happened during last days. Let me say something about my weekend. It was great. On Friday after skool, i went to the city. I though that my train is at 3:55.., i have no idea how i checked the schedule but there was no trian at that time. I got so mad, cuz i went to that station, i looked the thing and there was no train at 3:55. Oh... im crazy. But any ways i came back home, and i aet something, and then i check with my dad the schedule, and the earliest train was at 4:33. So i got ready, and my brother and my sister - they walked me to that station. I was kinda a lil scared, cuz i had to change at Jamaica the train. Oh.. i dont like that shit, im scared that i can get lost. But it was ok. The train was at the same platform, so i didnt have to go somewhere and change my place. lol.. so any way, i got to PennStation, and there was aaaaa lot of people... oh.. i was like"how im gonna find Stella in that crowd". And then.. i was just standing there, pretending that im lookin at the schedule with trains and there gates... and everyone was like lookin at me.. hEhEhe.. So then.,. i looked some man, and he looked me back. And then he come to me to talk. He started his conversation from sayin that he likes my boots. lol.. i was like "ok.. cool". and then we talked a lil, and Stella came, and we said nice "bye" to that man (he was about 23 -25_something like that). And we were walkin away, and then he's runnin after us, askin if i wanna go out with him sometimes.. LOL... nice nice.... After that.. we went to Stelka house. It was such a beautiful weather outside. i loved it. No wind, no cold.. GREAT !!!> We got to her house, and she showed me her pictures. DAMMmmnn there was so good, and so beautiful. I love it. Good job. andI wish u sisteer everything best on that way.,. GOOD luck:*:*:):):: Then we rested and we aet some yuuumi chicken wirth crazy, big french fries. lol. it was good. After that, we got ready and we went to see some movie. We choose "BE COOL" .. the movie is COOL !!!! There plays lot of stars and its funny. We like it. and after that we saw that interview with tha famous woman from tv. she was interviewin someone. i think it was someone from the movie RING 2. It was cool. We stayed like 5 min, to see whats going on, and then we went to the store buy something. We boough nail colors, lip glosses and DOVE chocolate. We walked on the street, and we talked talked and talked.... lol.. When we got home, we were just lying on the bed, still talkin and ... of course watching some tv. We had fun. We went to sleep about 1 oclok. but i was mad tired, i had such a long week, and such a long day and i still went to sleep late. ANy way... i slept good and lets say that STelka WOKE ME UP at....................9:17 !!!!!!!!!!! DAmmMMnnn I was like..."what the heck?". I wanted to sleep longer, but we both decided to watch tv in the bed, and talk a lil. So we saw that crazy movie about two retarded kids, that fall in love. It was kinda cute, but... also very crazy... Like... everyone needs some love, but that was just weird.. like.. how they gonna handel things in the life and bla bla... IDk.. it was crazy... and cute.. 2 retardes in love:):).. yuuumi.. hehehehe... but even they need someone to love and to be loved. After that we went to 34 street, some shopping. We went to cOOl stores.. I love it. We saw a lot of fashion clothes. hehhee and we tried COOL dresses.. a big dresses for prom... WE both LOOOk like cinDErEllAs !!!! ulalalalla./.. We looked so cute and beautiful both.:). YEAH STELCZYK??? ;)... KISS YA:*. Any way, after that we went to aet that nnnnassssty pizza. it was awful.. !!! i dont like it at all. What i like it, it was CoCA -ColA.. it was allright. hehehehe.;) lool... . After that, we came to Stelka house, and we decided to play pool. It was crazy.. i guess i won few times, but i also lost. Shes good at it. hehehehhe.. ;)> And after that about 4:15 we went to PennStation, cuz i needed to go back to Long Island. Oh.. i got on the train and i started to read my book, that my teacher gave it to me. Actually, i like it a lot. It;s a cool book. ;). And i came home... and i felt again this... weird atmosfere of that stupid, boring Long Beach. Oh... I hate this town. its so bored. Here is nothing to do. Teenager all they do... they are on so poor label.. liek.. all they do its drinkin, big party, smokin weed, and getttin with some bitches. Ewwwww... I like... to go out somehwere.. see some new places.. do something cool... when im young i wanna see a lot.. not only having stupid party and drink alcohol.. thats not a lot of fun. Any way... When i came home.. i didnt also want to spend next saturday borin night. watchin tv, or doin notting,.. so i decided to go with my friend to a spanish party, which started around 7 pm.. hehehe... SOMETHING NEW.. !! i've never went to spanish party.. DAmmm It was mad crazy !!!!!! But i had fun.. it was ok.. adn i met some people. ;) kOOl kOOl. After that about 11, i Went to see my baby.. He was very mad.. lol... but he got a lil better later on,... and we both had good time.:). Then i came home and i went to sleep

czesc ludki

czesc moje kofane ludki. No wiec. u mnie juz o niebo lepiej. Dzis bylam w szkole i wogole nawet mialam ciekawey dzien. Teraz mysle tylko o jendym jak tu przekonac mame, zeby mi pozwolila jechac i spac u kolezanki na noc. bo ostatnio za duzo moja mama czyta o tych terrorystach i teraz boi sie ze planuja nowy atak i nie chce mi pozwolic jechac do kolezanki. No ale.. moze jakos mi sie uda ja przekonac. zobaczymy. Tak czy siak. u mnie juz jest wszystko dobrze, a to ze bylam smutna to wydarzylo sie rok temu, dokladnie 16 marca 2004. Ogolnie czuje sie juz dobrze, ale jakos nadal jest to w srodku mnie, No ale moja najlepsza przyjaciolka Stelka, ktora jest dla mnie jak siostra pomogla mi duzo, i pocieszyla na duchu. Tak samo moj uroczy chlopaczek, byl przy mnie wczoraj i tez mi duzo pomogl jakos przetrwac ten dzien. Jestem szczesliwa ze mam ich przy sobie i ze tak mnie oboje kochaja a ja kocham ich. No i oczywiscie strasznie kocham moja cala rodzinke, ktora jest tam na drugiej stronie SWIATA. MOja urocza, i najlepsza babcie na swiecie, ciotki i wujkow no i oczywiscie malutka Gabe, Grzesia i mojego kochniutkiego braciszka Bartusia, ktory regularnie odwiedza mojego bloga. No WIELKA BUZKA i MOC USCISKOW DLA was SYSKICH., Bartek przekaz pozdrowienia i wielka buzke dla wszystkich!!! ok? NIe zapominj !!!! no.. 3majcie sie moje kochane ludki. kOCHAM WAS !!!!!

hey...:)

Hey mY lOvElY :). hEhE... Im feelin muhc better than yesterday. Im alright. Right now im only thinking how to convince my mom to let me go to the city. oh.. shes reading too much about terrorist and stuff like that. Oh i wish they will find all terrorist, and kill them all. hehehe... i hate this iraq people.. if i would do something i would get some nice., big gun and kill all of them. Oh. thats only my opinion.. but i really feel like they fuck with world too much and there is no way to save them and let them go. Or even WHY U.S. is helpin now Iraq? thats kinda retarded, cuz it can happen a lot shit. Like the government over there will get strong, and then iraq will get good army.. and then.. they will do some shit agian to US...!!!> oH... people are sometimes SOOO stupid that Even GOD can't help them. But why im talkin about iraq? fuck those niggas. LMAO.. ugly people. Any way.. i want you all kno, that im feelin better, and the event that happened to me, and this sad note, was about what happened year ago at March 16, 2004. Today im feelin better, but its still inside me. But my GREAT sister Stelka, hehehe... she cheered me up, and she make me feel better, even though i was tired and feelin bad. She told me a great news and im so freakin happy for her. YOU GO GURL !!! I LOVE YOU> and of course my baby, Cesar, he helped me a lot yesterday.. when i was having bad time. Thank you so much that for being there for me. I LOVE YOU!!! BIG, SwEEt kiSSES aND HUGE hUUgS fOr yA mY DeArS !!!!!!! :*:*

Sometimes i wanna just erase this day.. and I CANT !!!

I already wrote a note in polish to all my polish friends about March 16 - 2004. I HATE this date... When Im thinkin of this day, i keep cryin and askin GOD "WHY ME?. WHy not someone else? Why not some... stupid boy, or some disrespectful girl?.. Why me and My family?" I have all those question and i cant find this one answer.. WHY ME? I try to find and i keep on lookin for this sweet, secret answer.. and i cant. I feel so helpless.. and so small. I guess I wont never find the answer WHY ME. I dont wanna talk about what happened, cuz YOU aLL whos close to me, KNoW Well what happened that day. It ruined my whole life. And I cant go back, I cant do shit to do something. All i have is this HUGE pain inside me, like a big broken heart in million of pieces. I cried that day, and Im criein now and i will cry. Sometimes i feel like i can talk about that and everything is allright, but after a moment i feel pain inside and everything gets bad. I hate March, from that time. Its bring the most painful memory in my life that happened to me. I hope that one time i will get over it, and a least i'd talk about it and not cry. But for now on, the pain is killin me and the feelin is gettin all over me...........
I LOVED YOU AND I WILL LOVE U FOREVER WITH ALL MY HEART !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WymAzAC TEn DziEN z MEj PamiEcI? --- NiE dA sIe... Za ZaDnE sKaRBy

Czasem mysle, i blagam Boga w myslach zeby pomogl mi znalezc odpowiedz na te sekretne, slodkie pytanie, na ktore nie ma odpowiedzi. Pytam GO w myslach "Dlaczego JA?. DLaczego To mi sie przydarzylo? Dlaczego to NIE ON alBO ONA cierpi..., Dlaczego to Wlasnie Ja". 16 marca 2004, dzien, ktory wybil mnie z rytmu mojego zycia. Plakalam wtedy, plakalm pozniej, placze teraz i bede plakac juz zawsze. I pytam sie Ciebie, pytam sie JEGo, i pytam sie sama siebie "DLaczego JA?." Probuje znalezc odpowiedz, szukam w myslach i nie moge znalezc. Nastaje cisza.. i slysze tylko moje lzy i szlochanie... Czasem .. czasem mysle, ze juz jestem Ok zeby o tym rozmawiac, i zeby o tym pisac co mi sie przydarzlo, lecz po chwili SERCE peka mi znow i juz nie moge. Lzy zalewaja mnie i bol wraca na nowo. Wszyscy Ci, ktorzy sa ze mna blisko, wiedza co sie stalo tego dnia...---> Marzec... nienawidze tego miesiaca od tamtego czasu. Przywraca JEDNo, to najwieksze, najgorsze i najbardziej bolsene wspomnienie jakie moge teraz doswiadzcyc. Nie bede wspominac na glupim komputerze co sie stalo, bo MY wiemy. Mam nadzieje, ze kiedys naucze sie o tym mowic glosno i myslec glosniej, Mam nadzieje ze kiedys to wszystko obroci sie do mnie jakos i naucze sie z tym zyc. Wiem, jedno ze cokolwiek sie stanie, nigdy nie zapomne ze BARDZO CIE KOCHALAM I KOCHAC NA ZAWSZE BEDE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Czasem, czasem, czasem...
Czasem mysle czy to wszystko ma sens
Czy warto sie silic, tworzyc nowy wers?
Pozostac tym, kim sie jest w rzeczywistosci
Poddac sie nieznanej przyszlosci
Tak jak ludzie prosci, pelni honoru i godnosci
Zyc swoim zyciem, dazyc do doskonalosci
Doceniac rzeczy powszechne i uznane
Wierzyc mocno, ze jest sie losu panem
To co bylo mi dane juz wykorzystane
I co dalej?, Czy mam szanse jeszcze?
Gdy widze falszywe slowo skladane w podziemce
Tekturowych postaci z kazdym dniem coraz wiecej
Zle wibracje i tysiace klopotow
Czy nas zaszufladkuja?, Czy zrobia z nas idiotow?
Zrujnuja w sekundzie, wszystko to co ma cene?
Chwila zwatpenia, gdy umieraja me korzenie
Sama juz nie wiem po co bylo to wszystko
Czy warto bylo wychodziæ na boisko
I narazac sie na krytyke ogólu
Zamiast siedziec cicho wychylac sie z tlumu
Podkreœlajac swoja niezalezna egzystencje
Czasem widze, jak mi patrza na rece
Czasem widze rzeczy...
Czasem widze rzeczy, których nie chcialabym widziec
Oczekujac za co nastepny dzien mógl ulge przyniesc
Ze wszystkich moich ruchów jakas nauke wyniesc
I tym, którzy we mnie wierza wstydu nie uczynic
Chyba bylo warto, ale nie ma sie co winic
Poswiecajac sama siebie z calej mocy silic
Uwazajac ciagle na to, aby sie nie pomylic
W momentach przerazenia sama nad soba sie pochylic
Powoli sie ucze nie ufajac ukladom
Jak czlowiek z zycia wziety liryczny desperado
Sama tworze swe wartosci, sama kreuje swoje zwrotki
Teraz sie nauczylam, ze cel uswieca srodki
Ze trzeba byc prawdziwym, nie stac z klamstwem na ustach
Aby móc patrzec w oczy i nie wstydzic sie odbicia z lustra
Wszystkie sprawy w zyciu to decyzja wlasna
A co to mnie obchodzi, ze ktos bierze mnie za blazna
Choc los ustawil nas na róznych polach szachownicy
Olowiane zolnierzyki i prawdziwi zawodnicy
Co sie dla mnie liczy i przy jakich czuwam wrotach
W których slowach tworzy sie ma kolejna rota
Wiem, ze przyszlosc jest niepewna, jak wrózba z kart tarota
Moze bede wysoko, albo trafie wprost do blota
Nie potrafie tego zgadnac, rozpoznac swych obliczy
Nie moge utrzymac duszy, która o wolnosc krzyczy
W otoczeniu szarych bloków stoje ja - maly czlowiek
A setki mysli wypelniaja moja glowe
Czasem mysle, czy to wszystko sie oplaca?
Czy nie na darmo jest ta praca?
Gdy smiejecie sie wy, nie mówcie mi
Bo dzisiaj glucha jestem
Swoje lata pracowalam laczac muzyke z wersem
Stare czsy byly piekne i to bardzo
A teraz jest inaczej trenujac zyciowa wartosc
Posród ocen tych, co nie znaja robie swoje
Sama z prawdy sztandarem na barykazie stoje, sam
I nikogo nie ma z boku, nie zwolnie kroku
By zmeczona zyciem zasiasc przy Bogu
Nie wiem, czy koniec zycia tego nie jest blisko
Moze zamiast walczyc mozna rzucic to wszystko
Robia nie hiphop, tylko w discopolo tanczyc
Czasem mysle, czy warto z kazdym dniem walczyc zawsze?
Bo od kasy wazniejsze jest zycie szczere
Wsrod slodziutkich slówek nigdy nie zagubic siebie
Nieraz bylo tak, ze ladowalo sie na glebie
Ale byl ktos, kto reke dawal ci w potrzebie
Czasem patrze na to dumnym pewnym wzrokiem
Razem do przodu robiac nowy krok za krokiem
Lecz czasem czuje sie sama w tym swiecie calym

Czasem, czasem, czasem...
Czasem mysle CZY TO WSZYSTKO POPROSTU MA SENS>..?
CZY WARTO SIE SILLIC I TWORZYC ZYCIA NOWY WERS>..?

I sMEEl ........

BOY you know I like it when you climb on top
Love muscles feel tighter than a headlock
And you know I love the way you make the bed rock
Take me to extasy without taking Extasy

I'm feelin' your shape I'm feelin' your eyes
Later on I'm feelin' your ass and feelin' your thighs
Sweet heart your book smart and street smart uh huh
I knew you was my type from the very very start
I'm into tongue kissin' and four play all day
Mama ain't home so the noise is okay
O.D.B you know he like it the raw way
Latex safe sex no hickeys on the neck

BOY you know I like it when you climb on top
Love muscles feel tighter than a headlock
And you know I love the way you make the bed rock
Take me to extasy without taking Extasy

I SAID....

I said my name is PARADISE
Thats what I said to him
I said PARADISE
Thats what I said it would be
Cuz I, the finest women that He's ever did see
And not to mention how I looked in them jeans
Cuz I was, the definition of a ghetto queen
And you should see that apple bottom in jeans

I walkin down the runway
5'8"
'So fine what the fuck hes gon say
And he just sit patiently just waiting his turn
Waiting for his perfect chance so he can spit out his words
I think he openly spokenly damn i hope he notices me
Hopefully he go for me
So he on the boat with me
And ima take his places he can never imagine
Like water ski'in in costa rica
With snow mobiling in aspen
he prefare the cold
Winter, snow
And do shit like the tropical
Am i dreamin let me know
Tell me is it possible
That i could be the one he in search for a woman
And he could be that one that end my search for romance

And after dinner, shampagne, walks along the beaches
With the moonlight shines on ya features
And i cant create the words to explain myself
My temtation to feel ya body
Temtation to kiss them curves
One kiss two kiss he all on my neck now
Three kiss four kiss im all on his neck now that
Temperatures rising
Hips and thighs coming
Hynotizing man i dont wanna stop
It feels like

They dont understand me because i really dont understand myself
I cant live with out (my boy)
Paradise is mine mayne
Anywhere and time mayne
he gon hold it down cuz he (my boy)
he love me he love me not
he love me to be on top
And if you got ne doubts just ask when you see me out
Ill tell you who im talken bout
My Boy

Notka Dla Moich Skarbow !!!!!

Hey wy moje polaczki, rodaczki. No wiec, syscy mowicie zebym cos napisala po polsku bo juz tylko jedna note wlepilam i nic wiecej. No co nowego u mnie to nic takiego szczegolnego. Wiecie.. zycie milosne jest na najlepszych warunkach, sysko gra. A tak to szkola, dom, zadania domowe, jakies CHILL CHILL no i spanie i na drugi dzien to samo. Oh... ogolnie u nas w Stanach pogoda lipna./ Jakies burze sniezne, pozniej deszcze a po deszczach SloNcE, i pozniej ZNow Snieg. Normalnie to urwanie glowy. Ja juz mam dosc, i inni tez. Ostatnio w sobote bylo u nas strasznie ladniutko. SLoneczko grzalo, cieplutko, ze juz sie nawet bez kurtek chodzilo, a to znow zima... grrrr.... No ja jeszcze tydzien szkoly i juz ferie, Chyba Wielkanoc sie zbliza. yeah...
CO tam Wiecej Moge Napisac? Moze jak mi minol dzien dzi. Wiec, nic szczegolnego. Wstalam, i tak nie chcialo mi sie isc do szkoly ze jeszcze mielsimy sprawdzian z angielskiego, a ja nie czytalam ksiazki, wiec nie chcialam oblac kolejengo testu. bo z kazdego rodzialu nauczyciel robi nam testy. i prawie kazdy jak narazie oblalam, bo nie uwazam tylko gadam z czarnuchami. lol... nigga...;)> ni jest zle. Tak czy siak, poszlam do szkoly, juz pozniej bylo fajnie. Pierwszy U.S. History, moj nauczyciel jest spoko. Normalnie zianie caly czas, to dodalo mi dobrego humorku. pozniej ten glupi angielski mialam, i ten test, wiec z tesu chyba lipa, no ale nie wiem. Pozniej po tym, MAtemetyka... i hate this daily shit !!. oh.:(. normalnie ta matma, to mnie niszczy psychicznie. Tyle samo trwa co inne przedmioty ale jednak jest takkk zaaaajebiscie dluga.. ze nie wiem jak to sie dzieje, ze matma jest taka dluga, nudna, i wogole GLUPIA. no ale tak czy siak.. to zbieram ladne ocenki, normalnie same 100%. lol.. ;). no po matmie, to mialam Lunch, jedzonko.. yuuumii kanapka, i soczek, i ciacho. a pozniej ART, lol... normalnie to odkrylam u siebie talent artystyczny, moze skopjuje kilka moich rysunkow i wklepje na bloga, to sobie zobaczycie. Pozniej.. oh drugi Angielski.. oh... tez nudy, nauczycielka maca swoja dupe i wypina do uczniow.. ewwwwww.. hehehe... thats nASTY.. hehehe... no ale.e. tak czy siak, ostatnie dwie lekcje to byly DWIE biologie.. oH i test z biologi. Nie bylo zle. jakos mi poszlo. moze dostane jakies 90%. hehehe..;). No a tak.. to po szkole wrocilam do domku, zjadlam, pogratulowalam mojej mamie ze zdala na amerykanskie prawo jazdy. Nareszcie.. teraz mnie moze wozic wszedzie gdzie bede chciec. !!! juuupI !!!!!!!!...;):):). No a tak... to pozniej siadlam na komputer, i patrzylam na necie za jakimis fajnymi fryzurami. musze se cos zorbic z wlosami. No to tyle by bylo. Wiec.. musze spinac moje rodaki. Ide sie kompac i ide spac, bo cos mnie oko boli. eh... to oko... hehehhee;)> No wiec teraz nadszel czas jeszcze na pozdrowienia; wiec POZDRAWIAM serdecznie MOJEGO kochanego BRACISZKA - Bartusia ; playboy.. Normalnie to wielka buzka dla ciebie i bardzo Cie kocham, pamietaj o tym. Tak samo wielka BUZKA i Moc usciskow Dla Grzesia ; GoNZO, i dla Gabrysi. :):).. Tak samo sTrAsZniE dUzo BuzIakOw Dla ASI, sIoStRa,.. ALE NOwINKi sIE DziEjA.. lOL.. NoRMalNie TO KocHam Cie i StRaSZnie tEskNie !!!!!!, TaKe moC uScSkoW i BUzIa DLa IwCI, KochAM cIE:). i TakzE wIElkIe YOOOOo dLA KamIlka, FazI. 3Maj SIe kOFAniE<> Nie MOgE siE doCzEkAc ZeBY cIE ZoBAcZYc... WIELKA BUZKA DLA SYSKICH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:*:*:*:*:**::**
:*:*:*:*:* :*::**:*:*:*:*:*::*:::::::::::::::::*:*
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eVerY tImE i MakE mIsTakEs... :(

Some would say I lied.
But I think that I tried
To give you what you needed,
And to save a love that died.
I'm sorry for hurting your feelings
For causing you so much pain.
Sorry for the changes,
And sorry for all the rain
That my love poured upon your heart
And I'm sorry for the stain
That my love left upon your life
Creating so much pain.
I tried to give a love
That was so real and true
But after all the tears you cried
I say,I'm sorry To you.



Your feelings got hurt
For something I said
Something I did
For something, maybe
That I didn’t do
Sometimes I act in ways
That I regret
But it’s too late
The damage is done
Your pain Causes me pain too
So now, all I can say
Is that I’m sorry
Please forgive me
I’m sorry

hey.
today is some crazy bullshit day. I hate sunday. I woke up at 8:30 to get ready to go to Hempstead. Oh.. hate this !!!. I didnt feel goin there, i was even thinkin about stayin, but then i was like "fuck it", i'll go. After mass, we went to cool stores. We bought a lot stuff. Its crazy. lol;), When we got home, i didnt feel like doin anything. I went online and i check my sister blog. Its very cute, and she put some crazy shit over there. I was laughin my ass. lOL...if u wanna see her web, go there: www.joliestella.blogspot.com , have fun. lol;) Any way, when we were in the car, my parents started that crazy conversation about movin. LOL. i didn kno, that there is a opportunity rite now for us to move to another house. SO i started askin all those question. And now its juts talkin, its not 100% that we gonna move, but its confused feelin about movin. Cuz... if we move, then we change this crazy neigberhood, that'll be cool, but it will change everything. i Will get new bus to skool and i wont be anymore with my baby in the mornin and after skool. That'd be sucks...!!!!! :(:(:(... and i wont live far... its just few blocks, in West Beech. lol;)> And the bad thing also is that... maybe i'd have to share room with my lil sister but the room is gonna be huuuuuge.. so.. idk about that. lOl.. i dont kno if i wanna move, my parents are still thinkin, and if they'd want to, them we'll see. Any way, rite now, my eyes hurt me so much, Fuck. i think i'll go to sleep for a lil bit, but my friend Amy is comin over here, with her lil sister, so i dont kno.. i think i'll have to be awake. lol;)> Oh, now i g2g, i hope my day will get better, cuz for now its sucks/// BIG KISSES & HUGS FOR STELKA & CESAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gO tO slEEp bItCh !!!

I ain't gonna eat, I ain't gonna sleep
Ain't gonna breathe, til I see, what I wanna see
And what I wanna see, is you go to sleep, in the dirt
Permanently, you just being hurt, this ain't gonna work
For me, it just wouldn't be, sufficient enough
Cuz we, are just gonna be, enemies
As long as we breathe, I don't ever see, either of us
Coming to terms, where we can agree
There ain't gonna be, no reasoning, speakin wit me
You speak on my seed, then me, no speak-a ingles
So we gonna beef, and keep on beefin, unless
You're gonna agree, to meet with me in the flesh
And settle this face to face, and you're gonna see
A demon unleashed in me, that you've never seen
And you're gonna see, this gangster beat on himself
I see you D-12, and thanks, but me need no help
Me do this one all by my lonely, I don't need fifteen of my homies
When I see you, I'm seeing you, me and you only
We never met, but best believe you gon know me
When I'm this close, to see you exposed as phony
Come on, bitch, show me, pick me up, throw me
Lift me up, hold me, just like you told me
You was gonna do, that's what I thought, you're pitiful
I'm rid of you, all of you, Ja, you'll get it too!

Now go to sleep bitch!
Die, motherfucker, die! Ugh, time's up, bitch, close ya eyes
Go to sleep, bitch! (what?)
Why are you still alive? How many times I gotta say, close ya eyes?
And go to sleep bitch! (what?)
Die motherfucker die, bye, bye, motherfucker, bye, bye!
Go to sleep bitch! (what?)
Why are you still alive? Why, die motherfucker, ah, ah, ah...
...Go to sleep bitch!

IM IN sKOOl RiTE Now.. SO bOREd

Rite now im in skool. O mY GOD, im really feelin so bad, and idk wat to do. i guess i'll stay in this stupid skool, cuz the nurse shes crazy/ i mean i guess i even didn talk to nurse, but someone else from nurse office and she gave me ICE to suck it. LMAO. she said its gonna help me. oH.. shes crazy. i was like.."waT? " lol. but even though i took two ices and i did wat she said, cuz i didn want to go to my english class. any way we had substitute teacher , so borin. Rite now I have health, be4 that i had that crazy MAth. i hate math, but today i got to class and i did test as qucik as i could. and then i had free time. i was playin on my calculator and chatiin on aol/ lol/.im thinkni wat to do later on. I mean like how im gonne feel it. I even cried today fron ot Amy. idk Y. i just felt like cryin. Everything was so annoyin and stupid. lol . fuck it. i like the keyboard over here, its cool. i like, im writin so guick. lol/ im gonna take it to my house. lol;). lmao. hehehe. Be4 i was thinkin about life, lol. cuz i make every day such a stupid chocice that effects me and my friends and my family. oh.. not good. I was thinkin how to prevent myslef of makin wrong choices, but i dont know. i Guess im not learin on my own failures. oh:( thats kinda sucks, but wat can i do?. Like yesterday, we went to the fashion show. me, Cesar, Amy, Jen and Gonzalo, We all were chillin together, and we had such a crazy conversation. LOl. Ya all kno wat was about so, that between us. So any way.. lol. idk if i'd do that, lol its kinda VERY crazy, I guess Cesar was rite about chillin be4 with those folks and then do that if we would still want to. lol. but that all upset my baby, and i guess hes rite. i mean i KNo hes rite. it was stupid. kinda... havin...XXXXXXXXX front of otheres with others.... lol....crazy.. but LIFE is crazy. hehehe.. Maybe me and Jen will get togetjer and do that, and with Amy, u can watch it. hahahahah LMAO, jK. any way, i dont kno wat else to say, I guess that i shuld change my attitude and think much and much be4 i make choice. But in all this, the fact is to HAVIN fun in ur life, thats y there is many mistakes. lol. oh. lets talk about somethng els.e like.. how much i miss my boo today. oh. im so alone 2day at skool. hate this. lol and my baby hes such a sweetheart, he wrote me a note in the am, that hes not comin to skool.and that he loves me so much. ;). i love u too baby:*. ;). Oh.. i want so much skool to be opver and then i will just go home, EAT a lot ... some chocolate and some sweet stuff, and then im gonna rest a lil, and then chill with my baby.;). oh.. finally, this week was kinda busy and crazy. many stuff happened. lol. but we all good. SO..... i got 20 min more. o mY GOD. i dont like healt class. is mad borin.,, and here is a lot of people. Some of them act like they are fuckni retarded or shit like that. lol'... idk. Oh. i also miss my sister - Stelka !! oh.. i cant waite to see u. Last time i though like i wanna be so much like her, cuz shes sooooo cool and everything. AND i still i wanna be like her.lol. oh i love her so much and i wont let anyone to hurt her. Oh. and she got such a lovely boyfriend -Jorge. Hes cool, i talk to him, and hes all rite. lol. i hope they'll be together for a long time, havin fun and a good time. oh my God. in my class somthing stinks rite now., i gueess someone fart it.lol.. ewwwwwww... smell like eggs.. hhahhaha lmao. In my class there is kinda cute boy, but hes so puNk !!!!!! lol... im even kinda scared to talk to him, but hes nice, i mean hes cool. But he looks "wow" crazy... but any way he got gf, i guess someone like him -punk. lol. hehhehee... but... hes not as cute as my baby. lol.. my baby is sexy !!! and very nice, lovely, kind perosn.. he just drive me crazy, when im next to himm.. lol................................:). gOoD gOod. wat else i can say it? lol.. now its 10:44, im writin and writin, im gettin bored and i wanna pee. lol.... LMAO. oh.. Yesterday i talked with my ex bf. Kamil. hes gonna be 18 soon, lol., and if everything is gonna be good, then hes comin this summer to NY, ;). lol. he already invite me for his birthday party. lol..coOl CoOL. and he said he misses me,.. lol;). People who saw my picture with that lil shorts. lol.. they called me SEXY BITCH.. hahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. lmao.. and most of them told me today.. that its HOT.. lol.. wat can i say? its just a pic. loll.. and dont call me sexy bitch,.lol...;). lmao. hmm.. i like hot pppictures, lol.. its cool. and i like to do all this modelin stuff. My agent is comin back to NY at the end of this month, so we gonna do some stuff !!!!!! coOL..i cant waite. im bored. lol. and i cant waite to summer, and sprin time, there is gonna be so much to do..as a model. lol.. cOOL. i LIke it. :LOVe IT. OK. i Got 10 min, more. lol... i guess i will go to bathroom, i wrote a lot. im writin wat im thinkni in my mind rite now. lol. so i kiss ya all.. and i send u a big hUUUUG !!! mISS u STELKA and I LoVE u VerY much siS. !!!
BIG KISSES For U CeSar, LOvE u VERy mUch BAbY !!!!!! kISS , HUGS !!!

wAtS uP mY nIgGaS ?? lol.. mY hOmIes....  

lol... snOW snOw sNOw... 

mY POlIsh fRiEnD ASIA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oH.. MISS U sO mUch. TEsKniE AsIa , KoCHam CIe BARdzIO wIelkA bUziA dLa CIebIE i GoRaCY uScIsk @!! 

lol.... oH.. IM sUUcH a HoTtIe HErE.. lOL.. u LiKe? U WaNnA? LiCk? HuG? KIsS? fUck??? lmao !!! JUsT kIdDin. U cAN juSt LOOk aT iT... hAvE a gOoD oNe ;) 

looooll.... iM sOooOOOoOOO shY>... hAHHAhahAHahA... lItTlE doLL !!:) 

ThIS IS SoooOooooo Coool !!! I NeEdEd tO sHoW yA pEOpLe !! thAts mE !!! lOl... u cAN dOWnLoAd As a WaLlPaPeR.. ITs Ok... lOl !!! KiSs 4 Ya FoLkS!!!! 

TiMe WhEN WaS a Lot oF snOw HeRE At lONg BeAcH.. Lol. ThATs Me AnD My SiSTeR - aGaTa. 

CoOL DaY

Hey PeoPlE. !!! ToDaY i HAd SUcH a cOOl Day. I mEan... wE aLL thOugHT thAT thEre is No sChOoL toDay, But iT wAs 90 mIn DelAyEd, oH.. i WokE uP aT 6:51 aNd i LoOKed At tHe lBeAch.oRg WebSiDe aNd i SaW thaT inFo. I Was LiKE.. Ohh.. NO !!! aNd thEn I tOld mY mOM, thAt wE hAVe SchOol At 9, bUt i DiDnt wAnt To gO, Cuz i doNT LIkE maTH, sO i WanTEd tO gO at 10, But tHen my MoM wOkE mE uP, anD i dEciDeD tO gO at 9. CeSaR cOme wIth His MoM anD hIs BrO, tO gIveS Us A rIDe TO hIgH sKoOl, It Was CoOl. BUt I fElt kINdA bAd iN tHe mOrINiN. A lIl DiZzY anD sTuFf. IdK Y. WhEn I gOt To sKoOl iT wAs CoOl. I lIke It, I Had FuN aLl Day.. !! i TaLkEd WiTH PeoPLe, I lIstEN soMe HistOry, And IT WaS So mUch FuN, I guEsS thAT Was cOOl cuZ thE pErIodS wErE sHorTer !!! I thInk iT sHoUld bE lIkE thAT EvEryDaY.